5 sad conclusions of children with angry parents

I’ve been quiet this week.  Mostly because I had a rough time emotionally.  What does one write about when overwhelmed with sadness about the emotional pain some children endure in their families?  Nothing, it seems. 

In my work as a psychologist, I work with children.  I get to spend an incredibly vulnerable and fragile hour with children while they play out their little hearts in my playroom.

Incredible how perceptive children are about what is really going on in their family.  If only parents could grasp how their marriage relationship affects their children.  Or, how their tone can tell children something they didn’t intend. 

These are some of the things I’ve heard from my little clients from “normal” families:

1. I’m scared my parents find another kid and they don’t want me anymore;
2. My dad doesn’t like me.  He is going to sell me to the Arabs;
3. My mom wants to break up with my dad and marry Edward (Cullen from Twilight).  But she doesn’t realise he’s not a real person;
4. I want to say to my father he must leave my mom alone.  He must give her the money for petrol she asks for;
5. My dad is going to die because he doesn’t drink enough water.

I want to emphasise that these are relatively “normal” families.  Nothing abusive going on.  The only thing that I can see in these families are that the parents fight in front of the children.  The fathers show inappropriate anger towards the children and/or their mothers. 

And these are the conclusions children arrive at:  I’m not loved.  My mother is not loved.  I’m not worthy of love. 

How sad is that.   

How does this post make you feel?